I can’t automatically share my elation that I feel on paper. I don’t know why.
Whether it’s during my lovely moments with my sons and wife, when I got a grade of 1.0 in a subject in grad school, when I felt the satisfaction of understanding a scientific/technical concept, or even when I’m simply contented with everything about being the hell of a man that I am.
What I do is I pause savoring the moment, owning it for a while before finally letting it go.
It is during those times that I stay and be in the moment rather than writing the moment so that I can read it sometime later.
It’s as if I’m trying to get rid of the trash as soon as possible by defiling a clean piece of paper with bloody scribbles while letting the good moments sink in deep before passing it to someone else.
Trouble is, once the melancholia or euphoria is over, guess which of them leaves proof that it once came into existence?